Stop Being Afraid To Ask For Help
No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent.
John Donne
“I’ll be a burden, I’ll appear weak, I’ll have to return the favour (and it’ll be compulsory that I do so). It’ll be obvious that I am not in control of things. I’ll appear less intelligent than I seem. They’ll tell me NO. I don’t want to display my ignorance, I am ashamed, I should be able to figure it out- let me use my initiative, I’ll be airing my dirty laundry.”
I’m sure you can relate to some of these statements.
I have cringed at the thought of asking for help before, and it is even worse when you are asking for help from the same person/people all the time. That just makes you feel like your self-esteem and credibility are being thrown out of the window and there is nothing you can do about it. As people, we are generally egotistic. We want to be self-dependent and we don’t want to look like we are at a disadvantage. But really, ask yourself, what is the big deal about asking someone else for assistance., who has never asked for help? Your guess is as good as mine- NO ONE. Asking for help is no big deal. No one was born with magical powers to do everything and we have all asked for help in navigating this life at different points.
I think choosing not to ask for help is akin to suffering in silence. You want help but you’re afraid to ask- because that’s what it boils down to- FEAR. Fear of being ashamed, of being vulnerable, of other people’s perceptions. Hopefully, 2018 will be the year that you surprise yourself and start asking more for the help you need- and it can be with anything. How else do you think those goals, dreams and aspirations you have will be realised? So today, I am sharing with you 8 benefits of asking for help. These are all based on what I have personally experienced from seeking assistance from people or offering help, at various points in my life.
Asking for help and giving the help both weigh the same on my scale- I see none outweighing the other. It takes courage to ask and it takes a good disposition to want to help. When you do whichever is required of you though, it brings ease into your life. Have you ever been in a situation where you asked for help and afterwards, asked yourself, ‘why did I wait for so long to ask’ or, ‘why didn’t I ask earlier’ or ‘it was so easy to help out so and so with that?’ Doing both provides benefits and having been on both ends of the scale, these are the top 8 benefits asking for help provides.
8 Benefits Of Asking For Help
- You stop suffering in silence. Your needs are met, you can find a solution to the problem and can carry on with your life.
- You get to live life a little by reaching out for help, becoming bolder in the process.
- You reinforce the worldwide truth that you don’t know and can’t do it all. It’s an unnecessary burden to want to attempt to be able to sort out every problem or act like you know it all, but when you ask for help you give up that burden.
- You know more, become better, you are empowered and you grow.
- You are less dependent on yourself. Independence and self-sufficiency are good virtues but interdependence is better. There’s so much camaraderie when we depend on each other and asking for help helps with that.
- It shows you are human. Someone else probably thinks you have super powers but when you ask for help, you ‘look like’ a human, you suddenly become relatable and easy to connect with.
- You empower someone else. This is not about stroking someone’s ego. We have people around us who are knowledgeable and have so much to offer but because we don’t show our need for such information, talk less of asking, we have no access to it. You’ll be surprised at how many people don’t feel they have anything to offer when in fact, they are the missing link between you and your next accomplishment- and because you asked them for help, they feel relevant and valued.
- You become less egocentric. A major part of our fears around asking for help stems from people’s perception of us and asking for assistance help breaks down that mentality. You become less selfish and can give yourself more freely.
This is not to suggest that you should ask every Tom, Dick and Harry for help, but you know the people who have been placed in your path, these are the ones you should reach out to. This also doesn’t mean that we allow ourselves to be taken advantage of, but it means making things less difficult for someone else, making someone’s life easier and paying it forward. So this week, push aside your fears and ask someone for the help you need.
Do you sometimes struggle with asking for help, how have you become better at it?
Thanks so much for stopping by today. Till we chat again, make sure to ask for the help you need, keep shining, share the blog with your awesome tribe and take care of yourself XOXOXO
Image: Pixabay